HeartGate Retreat

Following a 3-day retreat in Oregon with Annam, some unexpected things happened, meaning they didn't necessarily come easily.
It was an intense group inquiry and sharing process, with time out an about for fun activities. Several long term students, for up to two decades, and me and Akemi, meeting the awakened teacher for the first time. I had been invited as a courteousy - no tuition - based on a number of phone calls which went well, and working with Pauli on Western Spiritual Teachers project. So some key points that I note, with regard to my own sharing in the group:
Asserting the moment of absolute silence that is at the root, always there when distraction leaves or
stillness arrives.
Answering to "there is nothing to take away from this retreat" with yes - I am taking away clarity.
Answering to "what is useful" with "that which brings completion."
Answering correctly with "absolute love" (I forget the Q lol)
Being honest about my shortcoming when the group was asked - feeling as a "lone arrow" after I hit the bulls eye.
To the word "wood" from Inei-Re teaching : wood starts as undivided, in a tree, is cut into pieces, then rebuilt into something stronger, a unity. We are the wood.
Describing sense of unity with the group - acceptance of the unknown of each person, the dark or light, all of it, right here and now.
The other 5 students were quite - contemplative - respectful. I tried to fit in but was sharing much more than others. Was on the phone today, as with every Tuesday, sharing again. Had very affirmative responses from Annam. Where next? Just stay with it. She did say that I "have it: sort of it, although I don't say it - something like that. I know what I have, cannot be removed or covered over, yet feels somewhat banal and at the same time preposterous to claim anything.